Dear Trump administration:
I was told by none other than President Donald J. Trump that consumer prices would come down as soon as he took office. In fact, I’m pretty sure he said it would happen on Day 1.
So you can imagine my surprise this weekend when, having just returned from buying $17,000 worth of groceries at notably non-down prices, I heard President Trump tell NBC News' “Meet the Press” that he “couldn’t care less” if his new tariffs cause the price of foreign-made cars to go up.
Up is down if you live in President Donald Trump's tariff world
I don’t mean to be a nitpicker, but “up” is the opposite of “down,” and “down” is the direction the president promised prices would go. Also – and again, I say this with all due respect – modern-day cars, even American-made ones, are made up of parts that come from all around the world. So prices are going to go up on all sorts of vehicles. And again, not to be rude, up is the opposite of the direction in which we were told prices would go.
So, I’m sure you can understand why President Trump not caring more about tariffs leading to price increases might be a bit annoying.
His economic magic thus far caused a key Federal Reserve inflation measure, the core personal consumption expenditures price index, to increase from January to February and led the University of Michigan's Survey of Consumers to report that consumer sentiment in March "fell for the third straight month, plummeting 12% from February."
Tariffs are tax cuts? No, my darling. No, they are not.
The president has repeatedly said tariffs are the greatest thing ever created and will make America rich. White House aide Peter Navarro said Sunday: “The message is that tariffs are tax cuts.”
OK. I appreciate that message. My question is: When can I expect my tax cut?
Because according to the Yale Budget Lab, the president’s 25% auto tariffs will increase vehicle prices “by 13.5% on average, the equivalent of an additional $6,400 to the price of an average new 2024 car.”
The Wall Street Journal reported that the president threatened U.S. automakers to not raise car prices because of his tariffs, suggesting he knows the costs from tariffs get passed along to consumers. One auto executive told The Journal: “The math would tell you, that’s going to cost us multibillions of dollars. So who pays for that?”
I have a bad feeling consumers like me are going to pay for that. And me paying for something is very much not the same as me getting a tax cut, as Navarro promised.
Trump cares about tariffs. He certainly does not care about us.
Navarro’s Sunday praise of tariffs continued: “Tariffs are jobs. Tariffs are national security. ... Tariffs will make America great again.”
If I’m following this right, tariffs are tax cuts and jobs. I suppose they are the dreams we hold dear. They are joy, and they are hope. They are the things in life we most desire, the stars upon which our aspirations hang. They are winning the lottery. They are the embodiment of all that is good and just.
I’m not sure where Navarro is getting his fairy dust from, but I hope he has stocked up because I assume the fairies will soon be passing along tariff costs to all U.S. consumers.
When should consumers expect to become rich from tariffs?
Which leads me to ask, once again: When, precisely, should I expect to be showered with all this sweet, sweet tariff money? Should I expect a check, or will it be direct deposit? When do I get rich?
Because at the moment, it seems my best-case scenario is driving a car I bought at a jacked-up price to a store to purchase food at a jacked-up price while the tariff-loving president who promised me a new Golden Age “couldn’t care less.”
It all feels a bit irksome, if I’m being honest. Please send my tariff tax-break money ASAP.
FollowUSA TODAY columnist Rex Huppkeon Bluesky at@rexhuppke.bsky.socialand on Facebook atfacebook.com/RexIsAJerk
